Feeling unequipped for your spiritual role as a parent?

You aren't alone.  This quote by Kimberly Hahn in Rome Sweet Home really put my job as a parent into perspective:  “Because I loved my parents, I loved the God they loved.  Because I believed my parents, I believed in the God they believed in-that He had done what they said He had done.  I believed the bible was true because they said it was” (Hahn & Hahn, 1993, p. 9).  Our children rely on us for not only their physical and emotional needs, but their spiritual needs as well, and I did not feel equipped to provide for those needs.  They will watch our actions, and turn to us for guidance, and I didn’t feel ready to guide them as I know I needed to. 

I was beginning to realize that my suitcase for drawing them into the faith and opening their eyes to the beauty of the Catholic Church was quite empty.  How was it that I had been a practicing Catholic for all these years, but my daily life and daily practices were not an example of this?  While I attended Sunday Mass and Holy Days of Obligation, and I was initiated into the church as an adult through the RCIA process, I lacked a true understanding of the teachings of the Church.  I knelt at Mass at the proper time, but I didn’t really know why.  I knew the vestments changed color throughout the year, but I didn’t know what those colors meant. 

If I didn’t know what these things meant, how was I equipped to pass on that information to my children?  I resolved myself to the fact that chances were there were others out there struggling with the same issue.  How can we guide our children and raise them in the faith if we don’t understand it ourselves?  This led me to reach out to friends and family for ideas and resources.  But, I kept coming up short.  I longed for a book that held more tools in one place.  Our lives are busy and our bookshelves are cluttered already, I didn’t have room for ten new books, all of which involved hour long lessons of which my children could only focus for ten minutes of it.  I was searching for a resource that contained devotions that were geared toward my young children, that would guide us in thoughtful reflection as a family, that followed the liturgical calendar, that incorporated facts about the Church’s traditions and practices, and that provided me with helpful guidance as a parent.

As I searched, and searched, the Holy Spirit placed an overwhelming thought in my heart:  create what you are searching for.  While this felt like a daunting task, and one that I was unprepared for, I placed my trust in the Lord.  After hours of prayerful discernment and questioning our Lord as to how I was equipped for such as task, I let go of my fears and placed my trust in the Lord to guide me along this path.